At Flexx, we love laughing at ourselves because let’s be honest, we’re goofy as anything! Going to the gym, though, is probably the best part of my day. Not only do I get to lift heavy weights and work my butt off, but it’s an amazing people watching experience that can really bring a lot of humor and happiness into your life. That’s why my truly favorite activity is creeping on my fellow gym-goers (and I mean that in the nicest way possible because I am guilty of being lots of these people). Here are nine types of people you can look forward to creeping on while you squat massive weight and pretend to not stare at them in the mirrors.
The Grunter. This dude or dudette would definitely be kicked out of Planet Fitness. It doesn’t matter whether he’s lifting 10 pounds or 1000 pounds, you can hear him singing the song of his people all the way in the locker room. Don’t get me wrong, I know a good grunt can help you get those last reps out, but when you do it all the time you’re kind of annoying and weird. Learn some deep breathing skills, buddy.
The girl in the perfectly coordinated matching outfit. Shout out to all my #FlexxElite Instagram fit girls! Neon colored shirt, black booty shorts, matching sneakers, and a fitted hat to boot. To be fair, this is totally me. And to be even fairer, I’m perfectly aware (and happy) I’m being judged for being “that girl” (minus the hat. I don’t get the hat thing at all). We all want to look good at the gym, but putting in so much effort and then pretending like it happened by accident makes us all think you’re (and I’m) crazy and looking for attention (which we kind of secretly are sometimes).
The marathoner. This person will be on the treadmill before you walk through the door. They’ll still be on the treadmill two hours later when you’re leaving (hopefully thanks to some added energy from Intra Drive). Dude, I don’t know how you do it, but honestly I’m slightly jealous because it’s clear you’re going to outrun me during the zombie apocalypse. Hopefully I can push down a tree or something with my huge muscles during the end of the world so you trip and get eaten first. Otherwise, I’m definitely screwed.
The flexer. Just got a sweet pump, better take off my hoodie and flex my biceps. Did one set of pulldowns? Let’s see how much my lats have grown. This is also me, and I’m so not ashamed, but I am judging others who behave in the same way. Judging them as awesome! Flaunt it if you got it friends!
The Crossfitter. This is the person who wants to do a WOD, but doesn’t want to pay the insane monthly fee that a Crossfit box requires or doesn’t have time to make it those classes. I totally get it man because if you’ve ever seen a Crossfit athlete you know they’re insanely ripped. Just please don’t drop that barbell on me while you’re trying to do 5 sets of 10 200-pound cleans in 30 seconds.
The Chatterbox. Who needs to actually work out when you can just talk about working out? I don’t have much to say here because I don’t like talking while lifting. Leave me alone.
The “Bros.” These guys congregate in small groups of 3-1000, have an air of cockiness about them, always skip leg day, and take up all the space that they possibly can to show their gym dominance. When you ask them how many more sets they have on the cable machine they let you know they won’t be done until next Tuesday because they need to talk for 10 minutes in between each set and do 10 sets each. Bro, if you don’t put your phone down and finish your sets, I’m going to break it. Unless, of course, you’re on @rexxsportsnutrition liking all of our hot athletes. Then, keep doing your thing my friends!
“I Don’t Lift Weights Heavier Than My Purse” Girl. This beauty comes to the gym in full make-up with her hair down. She’s convinced that lifting anything more than 5 pounds is going to make her bulky and look like a man. Instead, she’s destined to a life of running on the treadmill for 5 hours at a time. This was me until I learned the facts. I applaud your attempt at fitness, but let’s step it up a bit and hit those weights.
The “My Workout Is More Important Than Yours” Man. You know the person who doesn’t re-rack weights, steals your bench, or walks directly in front of you during sets? That’s them. They think their workout is more important than anyone else’s and can’t be bothered to follow any gym etiquette. If you’d just be more considerate maybe you would have more friends.
What other types of people do you meet at the gym?